How Gratitude Helps Us Through Uncertainty

A grounding practice for life’s liminal spaces

Here in the United States, we recently celebrated Thanksgiving, a time when we’re encouraged to pause and give thanks for all we have. But on the day before Thanksgiving, life handed me a quiet yet unsettling health scare, and I suddenly found myself sitting with some personal unknowns, the kind that remind us we can do everything “right” and still be thrust into the unexpected. And that’s when the real work of gratitude begins. Gratitude doesn’t require certainty; it simply asks that we stay present while we wait.

There’s a space between the moment we realize something might be wrong and the moment we finally know for sure. It’s a strange, suspended place heavy with possibility, crowded with fear, yet dotted with tiny glimmers of hope. But how do we hold onto those glimmers without sticking our heads in the sand or ignoring the reality in front of us?

The truth is, most of life occurs in that liminal, in-between space, where nothing is settled, and we have to learn to live with the shifting ground beneath us. Take the menopause transition, for example. It’s not defined by a single moment. It’s the transition itself, the stretch of time when hormones shift, symptoms fluctuate, and nothing feels entirely settled. That’s the kind of in-between space where so much of life actually happens.

And that’s where gratitude becomes less of a feeling and more of a practice. Just as women in perimenopause learn to navigate constantly shifting symptoms, gratitude helps us navigate any uncertainty life presents. It becomes something we turn to, not because things are easy, not to erase fear, and certainly not because it promises outcomes.

But gratitude gives us something to hold on to when everything feels uncertain. It helps us break that fear loop we naturally tend to get mired in. In my situation, I don’t say I’m grateful because it’s probably not something serious. I have no idea. Instead, gratitude brings me back to what is true in this moment. Some of these include:

• indicators that suggest the risk of a serious outcome is fairly low

• having access to excellent medical care

• being in otherwise good health

• experiencing moments of normalcy during times of stress

• catching anything potentially serious early

• taking my health seriously instead of avoiding it

• being okay at this moment

Someone else facing a similar situation may have different statements of gratitude. A woman in perimenopause might be grateful for a day without hot flashes or for finally understanding that what she's experiencing is normal. But whatever your situation, we all have something to hold on to. Something to keep us going until we reach the next stage of this journey.

Gratitude, however, is not just for emotional comfort. A gratitude practice can have physical benefits, which can impact future health outcomes. When we feel we are in danger, our bodies react by going into what is called “fight or flight” mode, which raises the stress hormone cortisol. This is especially relevant for women in the menopause transition years, whose bodies are already managing hormonal fluctuations that affect stress response. If this condition becomes chronic, the body can develop cardiovascular issues, metabolic disorders, gastrointestinal problems, immune system dysfunction, and sleep disturbances, just to name a few conditions. It’s well known that a gratitude practice can help to:

• lower cortisol levels

• slow down the brain’s threat response

• restore a sense of calm

• reduce predictive looping

So how do we anchor ourselves in gratitude when we’re caught in that in between space? One way is to bring our awareness back to what is true in the present moment, where gratitude becomes a stabilizing force we can hold onto. Here’s a simple exercise you can try the next time you find yourself waiting for answers.

1. Pause and take one slow breath.
   A slow breath signals the body to shift out of fight-or-flight mode and back toward physiologic safety.

2. Acknowledge the fear (“I am afraid of ___.”)
   Naming fear reduces its grip on the nervous system and stops it from running the show underneath the surface.

3. Acknowledge the uncertainty (“I do not know what comes next.”)
   Uncertainty is often harder than fear. Speaking it aloud is an act of honesty that brings you back to the present.

4. Recall a time in the past when you were waiting for answers.
   This activates your memory of past resilience and reminds you that you have navigated the in-between before.

5. What helped you stay grounded during that time?
   Your brain remembers coping strategies even when your body feels overwhelmed. Reflecting on them reconnects you to tools that already work for you.

6. Name three things that are true right now.
   Truth brings you out of imagined futures and back into the present moment, where anxiety has less power.

7. What supports can you call on now?
   Identifying internal, external, or practical supports helps restore a sense of agency, which reduces both fear and helplessness.

Gratitude won’t take away uncertainty, and it won’t guarantee outcomes. What it can do is steady us. It can remind us that the in-between is a place where we can draw on our past resilience, stay connected to what is true right now, and reach for the supports that carry us forward through the waiting period.

If you’re currently navigating your own liminal space, whether it's a health uncertainty, the menopause transition, or any life change, you’re not alone. I’d love to hear what helps you stay grounded during uncertain times. Feel free to reach out or share your reflections with me anytime. And if you're looking for support in navigating this stage of life, I’m here.

The information in this article is intended for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice. Nothing in this article is intended to diagnose, treat, prevent, or cure any disease. Always consult with your healthcare provider before making any dietary, lifestyle, or supplement changes, and do not forego, delay or disregard medical advice based on the content shared in this article. Please consider your personal situation and individual needs and do your own research.